This short story has an extremely great use of imagery. Your use of words paint a very vivid image for the reader. Your style of writing is fantastic as well. This story is very well written. I would even go as far as to say you are as skilled with words as the professionals. This piece had great emotionally impact. And was all in all a very powerful piece. I honestly have nothing negative to say about this. I could see it as though it were a film playing out due to how excellent the imagery was. I think your two strongest skills here are imagery and ability to convey all levels of emotions. It makes the reader get a sense of empathy. I could feel the pain, the sorrow despite never having gone through these things myself. Bravo OOmi! Hands down, the best short story I have read in years.